I’ve been quiet this week, I know. When I woke up Saturday morning after Friday’s ultrasound, I felt…. different. In a new place physically — 9 weeks pregnant? WHAT? I don’t DO 9 wks pregnant. And in a new place emotionally — I’ve never been here before. Maybe, just maybe, this is my time.

I called my grandmother Sat morning & told her. She cried. I’m glad Mama’s family knows now.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not completely zenned out. I mean, this is ME we’re talking about here. I still poke my boobs to make sure they hurt. & I look at the toilet paper every. single. time. I wipe. I notice every twinge & analyze it thoroughly to make sure it’s not something I need to fixate on.

But.

This time is different. I know that there are still a million things that can go wrong. But for now, I’m in a new place & I’m doing my damnedest to enjoy it.

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