In an hour, to be exact. Let the nail-chewing commence.

Fertility-challenged woman seeking local reproductive endocrinologist to get me pregnant. Must be motivated and determined to succeed. Important traits also include personable, compassionate, and willing to patiently endure occasional emotional glitches. Several years of experience preferred but not required. Sense of humor is a plus. If interested, please contact me immediately. Let’s get together and get me knocked up.