I’m single tonight (Bobby’s heading to Charleston for the night), and I’m pretty freakin’ excited. Sue and I are going to have a “sister night” of sorts… dunno what we’ll do, but I’m sure we’ll think of something.
And Bobby talked to the baby for the first time this morning. He addressed him as “Mr Amoeba” and asked him to “stay in there and cook a little longer.” It was funny and sweet… made my heart ache at the thought of losing this one.
But I’ve thought a lot about what Bri and Heather said in their comments. Bri stated:
The next few times I decided I would prepare myself, not allow myself to get excited and expect the worst. I thought it would help when tragedy struck. It didn’t. I was just as let down and just as devastated.
And Heather wrote:
I sit & force myself to think through the entire thing in both directions- how I will feel, what will most likely happen, the ramifications of it afterwards, and the long term effects. I do the “happy ending” first, then the “not so happy.”
I have some pretty freakin’ smart blogosphere friends, I have to say!
So I’ve been contemplating both of these thoughts, and I’ve gone through the best-case and worst-case scenario in my head, and I’ve decided that I’m going to just be excited in the here an now, and deal with the future as it comes. I’m not going to let the fear of what might happen cause me to miss out on this life-changing event.
And I AM SO EXCITED!! Truly I am. I want a baby. I’m so thrilled that I’m pregnant again… I even made a rash statement yesterday about “Morning sickness?! Bring it on!” (I’ll probably be eating – or puking those words – at some point), but I really want to experience and appreciate everything, even the nasty parts. And if it crashes, I’ll survive.
So if Mr Amoeba stays put, we’re looking at an April Fool’s baby… appropriate, no? And I really, really have a very non-Dave-friendly desire for an iron crib. I have visions of my grandbabies and great-grandbabies sleeping in this heirloom crib…. I’ll tell Bobby that when I suggest that we buy a crib that cost $1500!!! RIDICULOUS!