, , , , ,

Got up this morning, and on a whim, decided to do just one more… I mean, after all, I did practically pour water down myself yesterday while sitting on the toilet, which logically means that any hormone lurking in there would be diluted.

So I did.

Holy crap, I think I’m pregnant!! I cried, Bobby laughed, Susanna cried, Tom laughed, Jennifer cried, Maggie cried because she didn’t know why we were all laughing and crying. And this was all before 7am this morning.

I don’t even know what to think. My brain is racing a zillion miles per minute. I’m excited and a little (ok, a lot) in shock. Feel overwhelmed, happy, worried, thrilled, disbelieving. I can’t believe that it just happened – Sarah & Bobby, the freaky planners-extraordinaires, just got bumfuzzled.

I miss Mama so much. I know that she had something to do with this, and she’s giggling with glee right now. But I miss her. I want her here. I want her to go shopping with me and help me contemplate the nursery and baby names.

And I’m worried about money. Bobby’s not. He says that it will fall into place, and we’ll find a way to make it work. And the rational part of my brain knows that he’s right. But my inner number-cruncher thinks about the numbers – the medical expenses, and the nursery furniture, and the deficit we already have even WITHOUT another little mouth to feed, and I’m fighting a freak-out. At the same time that my insides are quivering with pure joy.

Bobby says I’m not allowed to freak out while he’s not here. Jennifer’s on a plane to Vegas and Sue’s at work, so they’re not available for my word spew. Thus the blogging.

Holy freakin’ crap. I find myself in a state of disbelief. Yes I do.